Hi, everyone. My name is Clint Adams, and I want you to know
that I sought you out specifically when I created Revive Your Purpose online.
As near-retirees, I see you all as accomplished individuals. Individuals that—I
assume—have set out a variety of goals and achieved them.
Accomplishing all you set out to do is truly fantastic, but
some of you may be asking, “What happens next?” Not only in your professional careers
but in your lives in general. Well…that’s why I’m here.
It’s my assumption that accomplished individuals also happen
to be rather intelligent. And I feel that the most intelligent individuals
perpetually ask “why?” In the next few minutes as your read this, in the backs
of your mind, I’d like you to reflect on your lives and ask, “Why?”
“Why did I choose this particular path?” “Why did I choose
to live life the way I have?”
Trust me, once you answer, you’ll be free to move onto the
three biggies; the three most important questions you’ll ever ask yourself:
1.
“Why am I here?”
2.
“What’s my purpose?”
3.
“What’s next?”
It’s my mission to help you discover these answers in the
most simplistic way.
I’ve seen it many times over: when living your true purpose your
current life will be much easier to understand, easier to make sense of when
your rightful objectives now stare you in the face and are no longer masked. You’ll
even know why “challenging” things happen within your life. Very little will
come at you by surprise.
In late-1991, at age 34, my life changed forever. I was
fiercely determined to uncover why I couldn’t have an intimate
relationship. A sense of urgency existed that I’d never known before. I felt
that answering this question would define my future fate. Not in a million
years could I have predicted what I’d discover.
My discovery, my story, remain mine. Only worth telling
again if—by doing so—helps you tell yours. Two conditions would have to be met
first though: 1) a safe environment; 2) mutual trust has been established. So,
until then…
Looking back, I’d initially thought that having experienced
this life-changing discovery was my purpose: to unveil a “kept secret,”
but no. It perhaps did prolong my life but didn’t answer why I’m
here.
For years, decades, I thought forgiveness was the key to
unlocking a healed and happy life. I also believed that I’d forgiven
successfully…many times over.
No, again. Forgiveness is divine, but full
forgiveness can only be accomplished with full compassion. To the best
of my ability, I forgave my parents, but still labeled them “narcissists.” I
despised narcissists, until I realized that I fit all the criteria of being one
myself. I know what made me so unhappy in life, but…
What made them so unhappy? Do the things they did? What
made them the way they were?
I was given this life to have these exact experiences so I
can learn and practice compassion, acceptance, patience in all forms
(unequivocally: my true purpose/mission in life). Not just for my parents, but for
everyone I’d judged, labeled a “narcissist.” After several years, I appreciate the
positive in my parents and I’m grateful to have learned that good does exist
in everyone.
I’ve told you that I’ve got a story, but what about yours? I
told you how important mine was, so you’d recognize my true “why I’m here.”
Have you asked yourselves why YOU’RE here? I don’t really participate in any
religion and don’t go to church but having had the circumstances that led up to
my own life-changing moment made me realize that there was something far
greater going on than my ego ever recognized.
Keep thinking about your WHY! All of you have had something
substantial that was a huge turning point in your lives. At this point in life,
I find it doubtful for any of you to say that “that hasn’t happened to me
(yet).” Mine led me to realize that practicing compassion for everyone
was my true purpose. My why.
I no longer point fingers, I no longer blame, and my
emotional age has finally caught up with my biological one. I wish I had gotten
there sooner, but, better late than never. Most narcissists remain children
“emotionally” until the day they die. Your own purpose may have nothing at all
to do with narcissism, developing and practicing compassion, so…
Have you identified yours yet?
If you’re at all wondering, I hope you’ll consider what I
share here, allow it to sit into your head for a while. My sincere hope is that
you’ll perhaps look at your life differently; take the burden off, give your own
“perfectionist” nature a rest. Stop feeling the need to control everything. The
plan you’ve devised may be wonderful, but there may be an even more perfect one
out there.
Please consider attending one of my Revive Your Purpose
online workshops. Two hours of time that I’m hoping will stimulate your mind,
prompt you to look objectively at the why of it all: your life and why
you’re here.
A small group, only 4-8 individuals, sometimes working in
pairs online. I’ll briefly share, then it’s your turn. Anyone who wants to can,
while others listen. This isn’t analysis, not group therapy, most certainly not
Dr. Phil. All without emotion. Looking at the turning points of your lives
rationally.
At your crossroads, did you elect to take the difficult
path? If you took the easier, more manageable one, did another very similar
life-changing event take place? They tend to keep repeating over and over
and over again until we accept the challenge.
More than anything, did you feel compelled to take action
you felt was mandatory? Did it make you recognize that you have a purpose? Definitely
not an obligation, a purpose that was placed before you?
This is the whole point of the workshop. As we listen to the
stories, look for commonality in their overall meaning. Maybe we’ll find out
that we have so much more in common with our neighbors than differences.
There are so many helpful tools at our disposal today; some
better than others, some resonate within us. Personally, I’m not big on trends,
gimmicks, quick fixes or anything scientific. It’s my belief that lessons exist
for us for as long as we’re alive, and then some… If we learn everything/all of
them now, quite simply we’d no longer be here.
I hope that if—and after—you attend, you’ll want to invest
in more ME time; walks alone in nature, anyplace where busyness is at a
minimum. If you’re lucky enough, blessed enough to find alone time in nature
while out for a walk, ask a question you need an answer to. Just ask quietly,
right as you take your first steps.
When you walk for a while, 30 min. to an hour, the answer or
answers will be inside your head, will be provided for you simply because you’d
asked, and your mind had minimal clutter in your head to be able to distinguish
answer(s) from clutter.
I’ve spent a lot of time alone in life; somehow, I think it’s
been a substantial part of my purpose to do so, to learn, to heal, to recognize,
remember and to practice my purpose for being here.
Having others around us is great. Maybe we’ve existed here
before with folks we’re connected to. But, I feel strongly we’re here now to
learn our lessons, those that were given to us exclusively, not
collectively.
One of the best feelings on earth is to not be supported by
anyone else, but to know that you need no support/approval/acknowledgement from
anyone, not even family or a mate. No one else.
I used to write books for middle graders; the protagonist,
Miguelito, lived with a fatal form of a skin-blistering disease called EB. One
of the main ingredients that kept him going were his To Do lists. Simply
put, he felt that the more he NEEDED to do in life, the longer he had to
hang around to get them done. His wise aunt encouraged him to make a new entry
daily. Miguelito’s To Do list was always full.
He was a pre-teen in those books and his purpose wasn’t
really on his mind, certainly too deep a concept for someone that young. As
adults, mature adults, our needs mimic those of Miguelito’s.
The more we need (NOT desire) to do, to learn,
the longer we’ll have to be here to accomplish (more). As adults,
hopefully wise adults, we should know that learning lessons put in front of us,
needing to learn them, is maybe even more significant than checking off tasks,
chores, errands.
Do you feel as if you’ve done it all? Stop…and reflect. After
achieving yet wondering what’s next, reviving your purpose may add years to your
(personal) calendar and give your life a meaning, sense of accomplishment that may
make you say,
“Whew! This is bigger than I thought…and it’s
fulfilling!”
When I reflect on my story, my life-changing moment, I do it
with no feeling, really; it’s part of my fiber now. I do know for a fact that
without having discovered that truth, I wouldn’t be standing here today. If I
hadn’t learned and practiced compassion for my parents, for all those involved
in that “truth,” and inevitably for others, I’d be missing the greatest
satisfaction I feel in my life. And, I’m still at it.
We are all tested every day, giving us more and more
opportunities to learn and practice patience, compassion, whatever it is. Thank
goodness for these tests. My goal remains to pass these tests, not get an A or
A+. This should be the goal for all of us: none of us are perfect, none of us
will learn it all.
Whether you have interest in meeting with me again by
attending the workshops I’m offering, I’d like you to ask yourselves one
question when you’re alone, by yourself, have no noise around you, “Why?” “Why
am I here?” “Why am I living this life?” and “Am I living a life where I
recognize repeat “lessons” and choose to take them on?” or “Were they simply
coincidences?”
Create a To Do list, make it full and keep it full.
You may find that this incites passion, creates excitement about what’s to come:
a fulfilling future. If you haven’t yet, discover your truth, do your best to
deal with it and then learn from it.
No matter how determined I was, I never could have attained
my truth without help I never knew existed. The truth that was given to me in
1991 was the most precious gift of my lifetime; as a result, it would be the
ultimate betrayal to deny the purpose I’d been granted, a huge slap in the
face.
I share all this with you now, because I want all of you to
recognize this rare gift you were born with: your true purpose. My goal
at the end of the day is to say, “Job well done.” I’d like you all to have that
same feeling, to say those same words…after you’d answered your “why.”
